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I have always imagined that while I’ve been in El Salvador
an earthquake would happen or a volcano would erupt or a hurricane would make
the rain last for days on end until my house collapsed. I never ever imagined that the first
funeral I would ever attend, after 2.5 years in a country with the highest
murder rate in the world, would be that of my host mother, Niña Chita. On March 22, after visiting her for two
hours in the hospital, she died in the late afternoon after a long and arduous
battle with Chagas’ disease. My
world and that of the entire community of San Isidro was rocked.
The people of El Salvador reminded me once again why it is I
love living in this country.
Immediately after the phone call from Silvia, Niña Chita’s daughter and
my very good friend, that the Chita had died, it took about 30 seconds for
everyone in San Isidro to know. I
was in the house with the family and immediately 10 women showed up with brooms
and the energy to work through the night.
Salvis respond to tragedy with lots of love and are ready to hug and cry
right alongside their neighbors. I
was so touched by the unbelievable outpour of love from fellow San Isidrenses
after the Chita died. Now, I
should explain why that is and what the funeral process in El Salvador is.
When someone dies in El Salvador the body is immediately
delivered to the family’s house where an all night vigil takes place. The idea is rooted in the belief that
the spirit of the deceased will return to the house and the family wants it to
go to Heaven, not stay in the house.
So they stay up all night to keep it out. Also, the idea of a vigil, alongside the body, is such a
beautiful way to mourn. Everyone
who knew the person shows up and can see the person for the last time. Then, everyone sits around together
praying, crying, and mourning letting the reality of the death sink in. It’s a communal process and everyone is
there to support everyone.
Typical traditions in Salvadoran vigils are that the entire
community and everyone who knew the person come over all night and eat sweet
breads and drink coffee. The women
and the pious men all pray and sing, while the irresponsible men of the
community get drunk and play cards.
At some point late in the night when only the family and most devout friends
of the deceased remain, alongside all the drunks, a few drunks elect themselves
to go to the cemetery to dig the grave for the family. The next morning everyone reunites and
eats breakfast, in our case, chicken soup, and begins praying and saying goodbye
again.
The funeral takes place and then the entire community (or
everyone who knew the deceased) walk a long and semi-challenging 4kms to the
town graveyard where final words are said and the person is laid to rest. Niña Chita was in the ground 23 hours
after she died. It was a quick
process, but everyone made their peace and let the reality set in.
It’s been a month since the Chita died and so much has
happened. I’ve returned to my
normal self, which is a terrible blogger.
It’s hard finding inspiration these days. Niña Chita dying and my best friends robbing me and a lot of
my projects just stagnating or falling apart altogether has really left
me....not surprised. I was going
to say depressed or cynical, but this time I don’t feel that I’m any of those
words. I don’t want to be a
Negative Nancy either, so I’m going to leave what these commentaries will lead
to unsaid for another time.
I’m about to get a big shockwave of visitors. Starting May 5 my friend Joanna is
coming until May 19. On May 19 my
friend Rachel will visit me for a week leaving May 26. On May 26 my sister Lindsay and my
nephew Eli are coming to visit me for 17 days. So until June 11 I will be translating and tour guiding some
great people around. I’m not sure
how I’m going to feel by the end, but I’m thinking I will be ready for another
visit! I’ve gotten to a point
where I haven’t quite giving up on my Peace Corps career, but I’m just not
upset that I’m stagnating. If some
projects get finished, great. If
not, I won’t cry. So, when my
visitors come, I’m going to enjoy their presence and I’m going to show them
exactly why I’m in love with El Salvador.
And, I promise them, they too will leave loving these 21,000 squared
kilometers of craziness.
This is probably the crappiest blog I’ve ever written but
I’m going to end it here. I just
need to get something up on the webpage so I stop thinking, “Oh gosh, I need to
write a blog still.” I’ll add some
commentaries later about the funny things that never cease to occur in my
life. Take care everyone. Hug your friends and loved ones.
Zaca
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